Lynn Berry

Some people don’t want to be positive. They can’t see they have anything to be positive about. They are constantly receiving confirmation that negative stuff happens to them. Of course the more they believe negative things happen to them, the more this will happen. Thinking about something hard enough will attract that something.

In many ways our society is based on negativity. The majority of stories in the news are negative and we want, even demand, these negative stories. We seem to believe that such stories are a confirmation about the underlying quality of people.

Actually these stories are about the failure of our systems – family, educational, political, religious, corporate. These systems have failed us because at the core is control over us. In their effort to control how we think and act, they have created maladjusted individuals who fear themselves, their emotions and their desires. Instead of encouraging a strong self esteem, people have been taught to doubt themselves and to put faith and trust in other people or in material things, such as money.

Essentially we are nations of lost souls, believing in the need to create money, and to have more, as a way to happiness. We encourage developing nations to follow our lead. We show them to consume, abuse and show them that money rules.

We are not happy though. I remember hearing comments from children in an African choir that toured the UK. They were from very poor backgrounds and were looking forward going to a rich country as they believed it would be better than their country. However, they said that in the UK people always looked very sad, even though they had everything. They weren’t the happy, smiling people they thought they would see.

Research has found that a negative interaction with someone has five times the impact of a positive interaction on mood. Many of these interactions happen at work. Research has also found that the influence of negative behaviour on others is very strong, such that, others display this negative behaviour. So the more you are around negative people, the more likely you are to start behaving like them.

It is not easy being positive when so much around us is negative. We could think therefore that it is a lot easier to stay negative. If we keep tuning into the “negative channels”, such as the media, being around negative people, thinking negative, then it will be difficult to be positive.

As you can imagine, there are few reasons why we should be positive. For a start we are happier and others feel happy around us. Have you noticed how people stay away from negative people, people who are always complaining about something, their health, their job, where they live, there is always something to complain about. It is most draining to be around these people.

Compare being around someone who is positive and happy. Who would you rather be around?

When we are positive, we are more in control of our lives. Wanting positive outcomes is a way to direct our lives. If we float along, anything can happen.

When we are positive, we are in control of our emotions. I’m always surprised at how many people have emotions that are out of control. Emotions are out of control when they govern our life. I’m not saying we should go around like robots. I am saying that we need to be aware just what our emotions are having us do, and of the consequences when we display certain emotions. See “Your Emotions“.

In general accomplishing things with a positive outlook is easier, life is easier. People notice positive people. This helps with jobs, being promoted, working with others. It helps in our relationships and in our health. It helps others to be positive and thus creates a more positive environment, one that we can all be happy in.

Being positive doesn’t necessarily mean a trip to your therapist. It does means watching your mind, watching your thoughts and emotions. When you have certain thoughts, ask why, and if you could have thought about it differently.

We spend a lot more time looking after our bodies, in feeding, caring for them than we do our mind. Our mind deserves our time. Spend time with your mind. If you don’t like it, start changing it.